The Corinne's disclaimer

The Republic of the 10 Corinnes is not responsible for any and all harm one might incur while peeking into their brilliant if weird universe, please be prepared to deal with all that may happen to you.. common side effects include but are not limited to : laughter, incontrollable sobbing, complete puzzlement, utter astonishment, etc..

Saturday, June 11, 2011

It happend one Thursday night... late

Let me just start by saying that Dana and I are night owls... we can never seem to go to bed before 1am... and for the most part I actually go to bed much later than that. Can anyone say insomniac? I can :) In fact I would say I am very well versed in the subject matter.

What often happens when we both stay up past 1am is better left unsaid.....     alright, since you insist I will write of it!  We lose our minds a little.. or a lot..... we usually throw caution to the wind and come up with wild schemes.  We have made our most expensive purchases at or just past 2am and here is a list to prove it:
  • 42" Flat Screen LED TV  $650
  • Professional Hair Straightener  $150
  • Warmachine $150
  • Warmachine  $100
  • Warmachine  $150  (I am starting to see a trend here....)
  • Professional Curling Irons  $100
  • Corinne's new computer  $450
  • need I go on?!?!....... I didn't think so
So, 2 am is not a good hour for our bank accounts!

When we are not busy spending our hard earned money, with wild abandon I might add,  we find ourselves contemplating the most absurd and often bizarre things!  I do believe some of our most crazy plans have been hatched in the wee hrs of the morning... on too many cookies and not enough sleep! Let me tell you about one such idea... 

Before I go on, I think I should point out that our overstimulated and overtired selves cannot be blamed for coming up with such ideas... however, what cannot be denied is the foolishness of our no longer tired and well rested selves that gleefully follow the craziness!

It happened one lone and dark Thursday night.... late.... very late.  We find our protagonists lounging, slack-jawed and bleary-eyed, staring at a computer screen as ridiculously large amounts of food were consumed on screen. [Man Vs. Food rocks our world!!] A stomach rumbled, the other answered the call...... As the on screen picture moved from one restaurant to the next, with more and more delicious food being prepared and ingested by the host, the empty and craving stomachs hatched a sinister plan.   As their human hosts were mostly comatose, the evil villains started chanting an old and powerful song...."Feed us.... feed us.... feed us.... feed us......" and so it went. 

Our poor tired protagonist could not hold against the siren song but being too tired to actually make anything to eat devised a plan to assuage the chanting beasts!!  Let's remember this hunger and create a magical feast!! Nothing on a normal scale would do, so they came up with the great Burgers and Dogs extravaganza. The plan was simple:
  1. Find several friends who like to eat
  2. Purchase a month's worth of groceries for one meal
  3. Convince said friends that yes, we need hamburgers and hot dogs! "Don't worry, we aren't eating full hamburgers... we'll make them Slider size!"
  4. Then talk them into letting you make fries and bring an insane number of "fixings"
And so the date was set and preparations began!  A whirlwind of action packed narrative would now follow if I wasn't too tired to write it all down... I am sure you can imagine. Start with going to 3 different stores to get all the ingredients one would need.... then picture the heroine slaving away chopping, seasoning, slow cooking, blending, processing and blending some more.... peeling, cleaning, packaging and finally loading the car.

A short car trip later (and what do you know we were actually early for once!) we arrived at the agreed upon location where such feast was to take place.  Cooking, frying, grilling, sauteing and microwaving ensued, more chopping and peeling. Finally the feast was ready.

**Reader disclaimer: what follows is a detailed account of the foods that were present, if you are in any way, shape or form even the least bit hungry, I would suggest pausing and going to get some food. Once you get past this point you may either get some ideas that may be bad for your health or be horrified enough to swear off food for life. You have now been warned**

The table groaned under the massive weight of such a feast, we prayed it would hold up until we could dig in; heavenly smells were wafting thru the house, so much so that the dogs were going crazy trying to get to the food.  And finally, the moment you have all been waiting for, here is the list:
  • Slider sized hamburgers
  • Hot Dogs
  • Buns
  • Grilled Pastrami
  • Pulled pork
  • French fries
  • Guacamole
  • Chili
  • Avocado slices
  • Grilled Onions
  • Lettuce
  • Tomatoes
  • Hummus
  • Muenster, Mozzarella and Cheddar cheese
  • Homemade parsley, garlic and sun dried tomato mayo
  • Mac & Cheese  (yup, we put it on the burgers! :) )
  • Bacon!!!
  • Ham
  • Relish
  • Sauerkraut
  • Watermelon  (no, we didn't put that in the burger!)
  • Fried eggs
  • Cheesecake (nope, not in the burgers either)
There may have been a few more... but after a while it all became just a bit hazy... mostly I just remember a lot of food... and needing a major nap afterwards!

The hungry stomachs rejoiced and scored another point : STOMACH 14 - HUMAN HOST 0

We prepared, we cooked, we ate... and maybe slightly regretted it afterwards... but I say: Well done! It was so worth it!  (we also took pictures of it with someone else's camera so I need to hunt them down, I'll post them later... I hope)

So the question "How many things can you put on your hamburger and/or hot dog?" can now finally be answered .. and that answer is at least 22

A word to the wise.... you probably DO NOT want to try this at home!